Asked who she would love to be in the music industry, she says Beyonce. A young techpreneur desires to be Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerburg. A footballer playing for a local football team wants to be Messie, Ronaldo, Mbappe…..
Why would one wish to go through the trouble of becoming someone else while they can be the one thing no one can be but themselves? Why would I want to be Michelle Obama when I can be the best Wanjiru Kaburu I can be? Why would I wish to be Lisa Nichols and inspire people like she does while I can be the best inspiration in my own unique and special ways? Why not just become THE BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF?
Let me tell you how.
- Dwelling on your past
- Giving people too much power
- Having limited beliefs
We all have a past. Good or bad, it’s in the past. Sadly, most of us live today with the pain, tears, disappointments and frustrations of yesterday. We don’t recognize that the past is gone, that the past belongs to the past and there is nothing we can do about it. We cry over spilt milk and broken glasses and let our past experience ruin our present, our future and hinder our progress. Sometimes, we rejoice so much over our past achievement and forget to work towards better days. In the journey of becoming the best version of yourself, you will need to forgive yourself for your mistakes, learn from them and move on stronger and wiser than you were before. As Joel Osteen says, “let your pain make you better and not bitter”. Let your past success and failure propel you to bigger things. You will need to let go of who you are and have been and welcome the idea of who you can become.
The second mistake most of us make that is a stumbling block to our actualization is giving other people too much power. Les Brown said, “never allow people’s opinions of you form your reality”. The truth is that people will always have something to say no matter what decisions you make and actions you take in your life. You need to realize this and let them be. Don’t let people’s opinions shape your life into their likeness. That’s too much power to give away! Stop wasting your energy and time worrying about what people think about you because what people say is a reflection of them, not you. Look yourself in the mirror and what you tell yourself is all that matters. Make whatever decisions you need to make towards making that person in the mirror better and create your own reality by 1st visualizing it then actualizing it.
The 3rd hindrance towards building the best version of ourselves is Limited Beliefs. In the words of Oprah Winfrey, “You don’t become what you want. You become what you believe”. You may have been brought up in an environment that conditioned you for failure and low self esteem that has followed you to your present. It’s time you noticed these voices and shut them up because the truth is there is nothing you cannot be, nothing you cannot have and no one you cannot be if you believe in yourself. Change your mindset from limited to unlimited. Condition your mind for success and it will be yours. Believe in your power to be the light that shines in the darkness, the flower that is nature’s beauty, a being endowed with everything you need to be and achieve everything you set yourself to achieve.
I have been a victim of these three hindrances. I never lived a day in my life without being controlled by my past mistakes. I cried, hated and condemned myself. This was made worse by the environment I was brought up in. An environment where the closest people in my life made me feel that I was good for nothing. I allowed myself to be a reflection of their projection. Over time, I started wondering what I lived for. I started doubting the reason for my existence. “What’s the need of being alive if I am this hideous, unsightly and disgusting”? What is my problem?” I was too tired and in High School, these were the constant questions on my mind that eventually led to me attempting suicide. Yes! I would be history but today I represent confidence, beauty, positive energy, progressiveness, inspiration, tenacity and zeal to achieve the unimaginable. I call myself intelligent, scintillating, gorgeous, amazing, blessed, an achiever. I look at myself in the mirror and tell myself, “You are beautiful. I love you. I forgive you. I commit to you”.
Getting to this point is however not serendipity. It is a deliberate choice and commitment to grow through it all and achieve it all; To love yourself with all your imperfections; To forgive yourself and live to fight another day; To believe in the reservoir of greatness in you even when no one else does and keep moving; To cry yourself to sleep and still force yourself out of your bed with a smile; To be discouraged, despised and discarded but still walk tall; To fall down, get trampled on, get bruised and broken but still get up, wipe the dust, lift your shoulders high and keep moving. Yes! To face it all but still keep working on yourself.
My challenge to everyone therefore is to make a decision and commit to stop desiring to be Beyonce, Oprah, Obama, Messi, Bill gates or anyone else. To believe in yourself. Own your dream. Be connected to it and be the best version of yourself!
As Lisa Nichols likes putting it, “quit asking for permission to become whoever you were already created to be”. Go ahead and be it. Those who know me know that this woman, Lisa Nichols, inspires me but I don’t want to be her! I want to be THE BEST VERSION OF MYSELF.